When they had finished eating, Tom said to Travolta, “John, do you truly love me more than these?”

“Yes, Tom,” he said, “you know that I love you.”

Tom said, “Watch Risky Business.”

Again Tom said, John, do you truly love me?”

He answered, “Yes, Tom, you know that I love you.”

Tom said, “Watch my movies.”

The third time he said to him, “John, do you love me?”

John was hurt because Tom asked him the third time, “Do you love me?” He said, “Tom, you are OT VII. You know that I love you.”

Tom said, “Watch Top Gun. I tell you the truth, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” Tom said this to indicate that the rest of John’s career would be spent filming adaptations of L. Ron Hubbard’s novels, like Battlefield Earth. Then he said to him, “Follow me!”

After he said this, he tried very hard to ascend to heaven, but the springs on Oprah’s sofa could not get him high enough.

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