In my campaign to reanimate my muscles now that winter’s over, I’m running again regularly, rather than sometimes on weekends when it’s not colder than 10° Fahrenheit. I like a two days on, one day off schedule, and I’ve so far stuck with it. Still, all the activity makes me hungry. This afternoon I had nothing from home, so I visited the vending machine down the hall, and because it didn’t interest me, I went to the one downstairs. It was also dissatisfying. Usually I buy animal crackers, which are fun to bite the heads from, but there weren’t any. I stared for ten minutes. I might have bought Chex mix, but that was gone too, and potato chips aren’t really my bag. Meanwhile, one particular slogan marched through my memory: “Packed with peanuts, Snickers really satisfies.” I almost agreed, too, but I ended up buying Farley’s Fruit Snacks, which have the benefit of being “Made with REAL FRUIT JUICE.” Me: 1; Advertisers: 0.

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