Hermits Rock

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Night Risings

Last night I had nose hair, which creeps down the nose like ivy creeps up a wall, peeking around the corners of my nostrils, so I determined to do something about it. I’ve never seen a great trimming system for nose hair. I heard once some tweeze it, but when I tried tweezers myself, I cried quick for the pain, and I refused to finish. For a while I tried a motorized spinning razor—I know Kyan recommends it—but using it I felt exposed, as if I were standing at the sink holding a vibrator up my nose. I found, too, that the motor’s so weak the razor often sticks at a dead stop, and what good is it then? Open its case, clean it out, then hope you put the razor back in so it spins on center. There are simply better places to insert a vibrator. I trim nose hair with scissors. Tiny scissors, yes, but scissors nonetheless. The hairs come out quickly and efficiently. I can control how long or how short I cut them. By trimming’s end, I see my conquests scattered about the sink, battlefield dead. Usually, I am careful. Last night, however, I clipped my septum. Much to my surprise, blood poured unforgivingly down my chin and dripped into the sink. I grabbed a Kleenex then, later, a cotton ball because the bleeding wouldn’t stop. I thought it was over at bedtime, but about 12.30 this morning I awoke suddenly and ran to the bathroom: my nose was bleeding again. It happened again at 3.00. Finally, I staunched it with another cotton ball wiped with Neosporin.

 

Comments

This is what I’ve come to love about Hermit’s Rock…the openness and the honesty and the technicolor mental images!

i’ve always used the tiny scissors on my swiss army knife.

no, it’s not the knife i was given when i was ten and promptly gashed my thigh open with. (the scar is a beaut. it runs about 2 1/2” long.) i lost that in a river somewhere in the carribean.

i use, instead, the swiss army knife i picked up for 2$ at a garage sale with the name keith engraved on it.

so, is nose hair less aesthetically pleasing than gushing blood?

upon reading this, i just said a really bad word in my office.

do you share an office with other upstanding christian professors?

nope. only degenerate christian professors are around me.

Man, this is a gross post. Get well soon.

Personally, I pick them out with my bare hands. If they’re long enough to make you ugly, they’re long enough for your fingers to reach.

I think this should be a lesson to you to do all your nose grooming well before your upcoming interview.
Hey, does anyone (J?) know what the religious climate in Denmark was in the 16-17th century?

Gushing blood is by far less aesthetically pleasing, but it might be more sublime.

And for the record, mine don’t hang so low that I can get a good grasp on them with my fingers, contrary to JH’s suggestion, but they are sometimes too visible, and thus must be mown down.

Re: Denmark. There’s an essay on that very thing on JSTOR—I referenced it last time I taught Hamlet, but for the life of me, I don’t remember the citation now. As I remember, tho, it was somewhat mirror of England, with a separatist Puritan community making significant noise. I’ll try to find my notes later.

Re: Something rotten in the state of Denmark: Ugh. Unfortunately, I think those notes got eaten when I my hard drive died two years ago. I’ll dig further, but no promises. :(

my knowledge of protestantism is woefully pathetic.

i know they officially became lutheran in 1536.

and i know that the advance of protestantism in the northern countries was much less pure than those who celebrate lutheranism and the other reformers want it to be.

or, that the affiliation of the state with this or that church tended to be much more machiavellian than religious. i was going to say political, but that would be rather redundant.

sorry…

how lovely to have such geeky friends. this is about as much info as i wanted, anyway. someone else pointed out to me that Hamlet is rooted much more in english sensibilities than danish, so i can pretty much wing the religious stuff based on what was happening in england anyway.

greg or j.—

do either of you have adobe acrobat—not the reader but the one that can convert files to .pdf. I need to convert a one slide powerpoint (.ppt) file to a .pdf to send to our campus print shop, but i don’t have acrobat. and i can’t find any free stuff that will really do it.

yeah, i got about a 2 year-old version of it. send it over, and i’ll see what i can do.

you can send it to the hermits if you can’t find my private mail account.

Thanks! I’m sending it to the old hotmail account right now.

I ought to be able to save to PDF on my mac, even w/o acrobat, although J’s method’s probably better.

just in case you don’t see my reply over at the hotmail acct., thanks for trying!

Hamlet: I agree it’s easy enough to stick with English Protestants without worrying too much (at all) about Denmark. When I tried to to talk that line, I ended up going even more broadly, and talked up Martin Luther and Hamlet’s German education (At Wittenberg? I forget, exactly, but it’s significant). Luther and a short overview of 16th-century England (Bloody Mary, etc.) was enough for my gen.ed class to circulate thought juices about why Hamlet was such a prick—or, anyway, it was enough to get my “discussion” (lecture) going as a possible theory for why he was such a prick. The notion that he’s at least a conflicted Protestant—with Claudius, Gertrude and all the rest as Catholic boobs—and H’s questioning of symbols and semiology begins to make early-modern metaphysical sense.

Hotmail: I do not remember the hotmail address. I tried to login, but couldn’t. I hope J had better success?

nope… didn’t have it… you can read the full account of the failure at hermits_rock and the traditional hermit pass

greg—re: your email…i sent you a copy, in case you want to try